Homework, what's that?

I usually start a post off by saying "My goodness, I'm a horrible blogger." But we already know that so I'll just skip all that and go straight to the point. That's going to be a little bit difficult though since I don't really have a point to this post. But I'll digress.

I love lists. So I'm going to make a list of things that I really, really want. Because what better way to torture myself, than to talk about things that I will never get.

1. A Canon EOS Rebel T3i
This is something that I would actually spend money on. If I had 900 dollars to spare. Which I don't. This is why it's so depressing. I've always wanted one of these and I will probably be wanting it for a very, very, very long time. Unless my brother (I'd say my dad, but I know that he would never get me one of those) got me one for my birthday/Christmas. I would love him forever.

2. The Kindle Fire
I know! I am such a hypocrite. I have said over and over again that I will never, ever get an e-reader. But in my defense... the Kindle Fire is more or less a tablet. Okay, feel free to shoot me now for betraying books. But when your nosey roommates ask you what you're reading all the time it is so embarrassing when you're reading a book with a half naked man on the cover.

3. A new laptop... Or just a new charger
My laptop charger is crap. When I plug it in I get nothing. And when you're trying to watch something on Netflix and your laptop dies on you. So incredibly annoying. Also, when I say "trying to watch Netflix" I, of course, mean "trying to write an important paper for school"

^forget that number three, because since the time i started this post and the time I'm actually posting it, I've bought a new charger (works wonderfully) and have since come up with a new number three.

So! 3. A new iPod.
Last night my iPod decided to dive into a waterfall. a.k.a. I accidentally knocked it into a sink with the faucet running. I thought I had saved it in time. I was even going to put it in some rice, just in case. But ALAS! I had no rice. So I just prayed. Took a chance to hope that it was okay. And it was! For a couple of hours. And then... And then it stopped working. Suddenly. Completely. It was the saddest day of my life. Well, not really, but still. The death of an iPod is incredibly tragic.

Okay, that wasn't much of a list, but those are the only things that I really, really want at the moment. Also I've wasted enough time and should probably be writing that important paper for school that I've been avoiding since yesterday afternoon

Me + Blog = FAIL. Also, Top Ten Books I'd Want On A Deserted Island

I really do stink at blogging. Especially for someone that reads SO MANY blogs, it's amazing I don't actually blog more myself. But I have a random urge to blog, so blogging is what I am doing. A themed post. I just got done reading a whole bunch of posts from another blog. They do this Top Ten Tuesday thing each week and one of their earlier postings caught my attention. So these are my Top Ten Books that I'd want with me if I was ever on a Deserted Island:

1. The Bible. Murder! Mayhem! And all the works. Plus, it has this pretty neat storyline about a God that loves us even though we're undeserving.

2. A Dictionary. And I'm not talking a wimpy pocket dictionary. There are some words that I just don't know the meaning of! And if I'm stranded on an island for the rest of my life, I really wouldn't like to be driven insane by something that mundane.

3. The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy. This book is one of my favorites, if not my favorite. Given to me by a friend as a graduation present from High School so I could become more diverse in my reading. The God of Small Things is dense, poetic, and heartbreaking. It took me four very long weeks to read, but in the end? Completely. Worth. It.

4. I'm going to cheat with number 4 and 5. The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien. I have all three books in one. I read Lord of the Rings before I even liked to read. That says something about how much I love the books. So if I can cheat with this 3-in-1 book, then I will!

5. The complete works of Jane Austen. Though I don't own it, I KNOW you can buy all seven of her novels in one book.

6. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling. This one was tough for me to choose, mainly, because SNAPE DIES. And I love Severus dearly. But I also really love this book. It's the end of, well, everything really. The books have all been read, the movies are done. What's next for Harry Potter? Other than rereading and rewatching all the books and movies over and over again to keep the world alive.

7. Kiss of Snow by Nalini Singh. Out of all the romance novels I've read, and trust me, I've read a lot. I picked this one. I had been anticipating this book for a very, very long time. And it didn't let me down. If you've ever read the Psy/Changeling series and actually love it as much as I do, then you'd probably pick this one too.

8. Just Listen by Sarah Dessen. I LOVE Sarah Dessen novels and Just Listen was my first and is my favorite of hers. Owen. Truly, that's enough said.

9. Perfect Fifths by Megan McCafferty. This book is the perfect conclusion to the Jessica Darling series. There's a few pages in this book that are just quotes from the other books in the series and those few pages I've read over and over again, about a million times. It's a super fast read, but honestly, it makes me really happy when I read it. And if I'm going to be deserted on an island for the rest of my life I'm sure to have a few sad days. This book will cheer me right up.

10. I think I might cheat again for this one. The Iliad and The Odyssey by Homer. Yes, I know for a fact that you can buy these two in one book. I've never read them, but they've been on my list for quite some time. Plus I feel like I'll be able to read them over and over again and keep picking up on things that I hadn't before. So it's sure to keep me entertained for a long time.

So I’ve decided that I absolutely stink at blogging. But I’m okay with that… at least for this week since it’s just one more thing that I can add the pile of failures. Which, by the way, at the end of this week will be a gigantic pile. I have FIVE exams this week. FIVE. And, in case, you didn’t read that right the first time I said that I have FIVE exams. Plus a paper to write. And a quiz. Or three. This week = gigantic pile of failures.

On the bright side though I get to go home next Wednesday (the 20th) for Easter Break. I’m skipping my classes on Thursday and Friday to go home early. I’m excited to go home for a long weekend. I really need it, especially after this week of FIVE exams. And right after Easter I only have a week and a half of classes and then its exams. (I have another 5 exams the first week of May) Good news though is that I get to go home on the 9th!! Beyond excitement! Of course, I just have to survive this week and the first week of May.

Now, I need to cheer myself up. So let’s talk about books! Lover Unleashed was, in my opinion, AMAZING. It didn’t focus on Payne and Manny, the MAIN couple of the book, as much as it probably should’ve. I can see why Ward needed to throw in a lot of stuff concerning Vishous and Jane. And then she had to introduce Xcor and his crew, but seriously? Payne and Manny didn’t really DO IT until the very end of the book. I just think that it should’ve had more time focusing on Payne and Manny. Since, you know, it was THEIR book. The other thing that got me was the lack of the Scribe Virgin. Yes, I hate her. But really? Payne is her daughter for crying out loud! I mean, the freakin’ Bloodletter got more page action in this book and he’s DEAD. It was a good book, don’t get me wrong, but I just think that Ward is building too many different stories in one book when she needs to focus on the main one! I am absolutely thrilled that Tohr’s book is next though! Beyond THRILLED! He was my original favorite… then the thing with Wellsie happened *sniffles* and he just fell off the map. *CRIES!!*

Anywho, enough about being sad. More talk of books! Happy books. Well, I hope they’re happy books. LOL. Kiss of Snow comes out at the end of May. Can you say ecstatic? Because that’s what I am. I mean, just look at this cover!: *wistful sigh* I think this was just what I needed to help me get through the night. Not blogging. Pshhh. Just looking at the cover of that book helped all by itself. L<3VE!!!!

Sunday [Monday] Seven!

1. I meant to post yesterday, but I completely forgot! I wasn't even that busy, though I never really had a spare moment. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but I just kept myself busy. Church and lunch with my friend Laura and her boyfriend Shaun (this is a usual thing on Sundays.) And then I did my homework and then clean my dorm room (it gets really dusty in here.) Then I helped my friend Valerie study for a test. We did that for a few hours and that also consisted of us going to get dinner at Waffle House. LOVE. THAT. PLACE. Then I did laundry! LOL. And also started reading a little bit. FOR FUN! I haven't read in forever! And this subject will take me to number 2!


2. I started reading Bel Canto last night. It's by Ann Patchett and it's really good right now! Here's the synopsis:

Somewhere in South America, at the home of the country's vice president, a lavish birthday party is being held in honor of Mr. Hosokawa, a powerful Japanese businessman. Roxanne Coss, opera's most revered soprano, has mesmerized the international guests with her singing. It is a perfect evening -- until a band of gun-wielding terrorists breaks in through the air-conditioning vents and takes the entire party hostage. But what begins as a panicked, life-threatening scenario slowly evolves into something quite different, as terrorists and hostages forge unexpected bonds and people from different countries and continents become compatriots.

Without the demands of the world to shape their days, life on the inside becomes more beautiful than anything they had ever known before. At once riveting and impassioned, the narrative becomes a moving exploration of how people communicate when music is the only common language. Friendship, compassion, and the chance for great love lead the characters to forget the real danger that has been set in motion and cannot be stopped.

3. So a while ago I discovered etsy.com. It. Is. Satan. I swear. I got these necklaces from there:

If you're every having trouble getting me a present just go there and get me a funky necklace. I LOVE necklaces or earrings. I don't wear much more jewelry than that.



4. I have 15 quizzes, 3 modules (they're like quizzes, but they take about an hour to do), 4 exams, a speech, and a paper due before spring break. Welcome to college. Sigh. I'm not stressed about the quizzes or the modules or even the paper and 2 of the exams, but the speech and the other 2 exams are going to be too much. Especially the exam that's online THE DAY BEFORE I LEAVE TO GO HOME! After my last class I have to come back to my room and take a darn test online! the second my last class is done I'm going to be SO READY for Spring Break that it's not even funny. And then I have to come back to reality and take a stupid test. SIGH!!!!!!!



5. Speaking of Spring Break, which I leave for home on the 12th and come back on the 20th of March, I am planning to order SO MANY BOOKS. I wanted to wait to order a ton of books with the gift cards I got from Barnes and Noble until Spring Break so I wouldn't have to carry ALL those books back home at the end of the semester. Can I just tell you how excited I am to spend a ridiculously large amount of money on books and not feel guilty about it?



6. Staying on the subject of Spring Break (can you tell that I REALLY want my Spring Break?), I am so excited to see my friends from back home! I miss my bestie. And I miss my family. And I miss MY BED!

See how comfy that looks. The picture was taken in the summer so I didn't need a comforter, but still! It's a queen size bed and SO COMFY. I miss it. And I miss cooking. And baking. oh jeez. Spring Break can NOT come fast enough.

7. I have class soonish. It's 11:55 and I have class at 12:35. Can I just say that I HATE English. This is my least favorite subject that I'm taking right now. Even my communications class is better. And I have to GIVE SPEECHES in that class!!

Ch-ch-changes.

I have not posted in FOREVER. And since then SO MUCH has changed. I'm now in my 5th week of school at Liberty. I'm not sure how I feel about school again yet. I still feel like it's a waste of money, especially with what I want to do. I'm not sure if I said what I wanted to do in the last post, but if I did then I probably put that I wanted to work with troubled teens. Which is definitely something that I still want to do, in some way, but not where my heart is anymore. I've ALWAYS wanted to own my own coffee shop. With a nice little used bookstore. a stage so I could host open mic night. somewhere close to a university so i can actually make it, successfully. I feel like this is something that could happen if I just put time and effort into it. I'm sure that some business classes would help, but spending THOUSANDS of dollars just for a piece of paper that says I'm a competent business person? I think that owning your own successful business comes from experience. Trials and failures. Hardships and fortunes. I'm not ignorant enough to think that having a successful business will be easy. I KNOW it isn't.

I think I just feel like I'm spending ALL my money on the experience of BEING away at a university than the actual learning itself. Which really isn't a good thing, at least not in my perspective. There's just this repetitive question in the back of my head ALL THE TIME: "Is spending this much money worth the few new things that you wouldn't have otherwise been able to get?"

Anywho, one HUGE perk of being up here at Liberty is that I get to see Kym! True, we haven't seen each other a whole lot (YET) but it's nice to know that she's close by.

I decided a while ago that I would do a "Sunday Seven." I think it's something that will help me post more often... or at least on a weekly basis. I decided to do this but obviously I never did. But this will start this Sunday! It's just going to be different things that have either happened in my week, will happen during my week, or just random thoughts or feelings. Probably a combination of all of them.

What the Future Holds..

So, this past Tuesday I went to the local Community college down here to get registered for classes... And I ended up walking out in the middle of it. Bad decision? Probably. Do I regret it? Maybe a little.

There hasn't been one moment in all the time I've lived in this town that I actually wanted to go to CCCC (Coastal Carolina Community College.) There's this saying that pretty much every teenager around here knows. Basically if you go to CCCC, then you'll never get out of this town. Which is true, pretty much. I don't know one person that's gone there, even with plans of transferring to a 4 year university, that has ever left. 2 year degrees turn into 2 year degrees that take 3 or 4 or 5 years to get. 65 easy credits, that turn into 65 credits spread out over the course of YEARS because of failings, not showing up, and droppings of a class or two.

I don't know what it is about this town that holds us here like a vise. But I've never wanted that. I've had too many friends that want so badly to leave here, but never do. It seems as though they just gave up or they got themselves pregnant/knocked someone up (Which happens A LOT around here.) Either way, it's something that I refuse to let happen to me. When I went out with my friend on the 3rd I told her that I was scared that I'd end up like most everyone esle: taking classes for the next someoddyears and working at various places of minimum wage employment. Never moving forward or backwards. In a stalemate of some sorts. She told me not to worry, that I was too ambitious, hell, even too scared to let that happen to myself. She's right, I know this, but doubt still plagues me.

My dad told me it was my decision. What I wanted to do, but he's the one that caused me to not apply to any universities. I don't regret that though. I could have gone to a university this fall, and then I would've been paying off a student loan. The curse of graduating a year early. When I hit 18 years old I get around 20 grand for 4 year from my mother's death. The money is to be spent however and whenever I want, preferably for college though. But since I did, in fact, graduate from High School a year early I haven't gotten that money yet. So the first semester of college I would have been broke. And indebt.

My dream is to run a teen home, or just work with troubled teens in some way. Throughout high school and even middle school I was the one my friends would always go to when they needed to talk to someone, when they were looking for advice, or just needed someone who wouldn't judge them. I'm not the nicest person in the world, some people may tell you otherwise, but trust me, I'm no saint. But for some odd reason my friends trusted me. I think 2 years ago it hit me that I wanted to help other teens. not just my friends, but other people who don't have someone to talk to about their problems. All my friends said they could easily see me in this role. I don't know if I'll have the strength to handle it, but I definitely have the heart. I've never doubted that. I might come off mean sometimes, but usually I'm just pointing out how obviously stupid someone is. That what they did, they know they shouldn't have done. Tough love, i guess is what people would call it. Call it some 6th sense or whatever, but I know when someone can handle tough love, and I know when someone is on a breaking point. And for that one simple reason my friends have supported me with my dream.

Anyway, I've applied to Liberty University for the Sping semester, by that time I'll have my roughly 20 grand to help pay my way. I just... I need prayers and good vibes or whatever you want to send my way. I have doubts, mostly in myself. I never think I'll make it to where I want to be, which is stupid, I know. But it's my nature. I'm not sure what I'll do if I don't get in. Wallow in self pity for a while then succumb to my fate of years and years at a 2 year college. Or be resilient and try again. God, I hope I'll try again.

Nervously Excited!

It's 1am in the morning and I'm watching Rome (the HBO series, really do love this show.) In about 11 hours I will be at Ellis airport picking up Mary and Sam. I'm extremely excited, but I'm still so nervous. It's different when you're so used to texting someone, and then the next thing you know they're right there! right in front of you. Everyone keeps saying that we'll have so much fun, and it's not that I don't think we will, I'm just worried that it'll be too weird for me actually having them here.

I'm very much an introvert. I don't think I'd call myself "antisocial" because I go out with friends all the time, it's just that when I'm with said friends I'm usually the quiet *coughSANEcough* one of the group. I'm just not a talker!! I listen. And I'm jsut nervous that that will affect our visit.